Trying to schedule anything can be a nightmare…add a surgeon, an oncologist, a radiation oncologist, and a cardiologist to the mix and you have yourself a tangled web. Everybody only had Friday available. Sorry folks, but that is not physically possible. We won’t even go to the emotional side of it all. So I shouted, “Jesus, take the wheel…take it from my hands.” Once I was done belting out Carrie Underwood and having a conversation with the man upstairs, I asked the oncologist for her blessing to push my chemo treatments back to 14May. She confirmed I wouldn’t perish if we delayed a week. Guys, Jesus took that wheel right out of my hands. All appointments, education class and port surgery are nice and spread out over the next two weeks and I can breathe again.
I am also really focusing on getting my mind in the right place and am really relieved I have an extra week to do so. I am also so thankful that I get to enjoy my baby’s birthday without focusing on the treatment the following day.
All of your support and messages have really helped me pull though the disappointment and shock of hearing that I needed chemo. I am finding that God is answering prayers in small and big ways. While I prayed for no chemo, he didn’t answer the prayer for a reason. He knows my path and he knows where I need to go. I found the below bible verse in my daughters bullet journal this afternoon and thought “Rachel, just be still. He is lining all of this up to bring good in your life.”
P. S. I can’t figure out this blog thing. It wouldn’t let me put the pic above And write below. Forgive me. Lol!
All my love…live each day big for you never know what tomorrow will bring